Social norms and the middle class model

Here’s the article in The Guardian that sparked this post: …people need a stake in society.

This article reported that 84% of UK children who seek help from the group Kids Company are runaways, usually maltreated by their families. In the U.S., anywhere between 1.6 million and 2.8 million children runaway, or are thrown out by their families, every year. According to the National Runaway Switchboard, the majority of children who seek help are running from an abusive or neglectful home.

The Middle Class Model assumes that children are born into two parent homes. That they are chosen, as opposed to unplanned. That they are loved and cared for as a treasure. That they are afforded the freedoms of Childhood in addition to necessities (don’t take your bicycle for granted, kids).

In reality, many children are born to single women. Many women are in abusive relationships because that’s what they learned from their abusive parents. Children learn social behavior from adults, and parental relationships provide a long-term study. If we humans learn more in the first 5 years of life than during the whole rest of it, this includes social/emotional communication & behavior. If a child grows up learning, from day one, that families yell and scream hateful words to each other, hit each other, fight with each other; that child (whose siblings are learning too) will grow up thinking that’s how Life IS. I’ve met so many people who have not learned what caring, kind, loving relationships are. It is a foreign concept, so they cannot trust kindness. They learn that kindness has an underlying motive of greed and selfishness. Kindness is a mask.

Lauren Hill  

Children learn that they are a burden to their parents. Instead of being taught how to be the future, they are taught that the world would be better off without them in it.

These are the children in Public Schools. Perhaps not all of them, but many. These are the children who are disruptive, because that’s the only way they receive attention from their parents. These are the children who’ve learned that negative attention is better than none, because if you’re spanking me, you at least have acknowledged my Presence.

I don’t mean to blame or judge parents, but that is my Philodox/Galliard nature. I make my own mistakes, to be sure. Some cycles of behavior are really tough to break! I take it One Day at a Time, and am eternally grateful to my support base. I just want to be clear, the struggles facing children in public schools are intricate, multi-generational, and as Ruby K. Payne has researched, directly related to socioeconomic status.

In 2009, 41% of babies in the U.S. were born to unwed mothers. (USA Today)

According to the National Fatherhood Initiative and Dr. Percy Ricketts, “Girls, whose mothers were teenagers at the time of their birth, are over 80% more likely to become teenage mothers as well.” I once knew a 17 year old, whose mother was a teen when she was born. For her 18th birthday, she was pregnant, and mom-soon-to-be-grandma took her to the strip club for a party.

This is the culture our fearless leaders do not recognize in their policies. This is the culture of the children in public schools. This is the culture that teachers are helpless to overcome. The really crazy part is when teens and a few parents post their antics to the public. Like duct-taping a baby to the wall. Toddlers shaking their groove thang. Every culture has its Redneck, and in this race for greed, education and enlightenment have suffered. Who needs to learn reading & math? You can just be a stripper when you grow up, and make buckets of money, so long as you don’t get hooked on cocaine. Land of the free baby!

10 out of every 1,000 children are maltreated, according to reports from Child Protective Services. Note these are the abuses that get reported. How many children suffer from abuse that is not reported?

How many children learn how to bully others because they are bullied by their parents at home? Virtues are no longer taught in the home because the parents are not at home, they’re working. Or Mom & Dad never learned virtues or even manners from their parents. In the past, parents read a Good Book to their children every day. C’mon Atheists, you must admit every world culture keeps a Good Book with moral & ethical teachings. How many children begin Kindergarten without even a good Dr. Seuss foundation?

Can you hold someone responsible for their actions if they didn’t know their behavior was wrong in the first place?

When I first began studying education, I had my own pair of rose colored glasses on. I started this blog to start a learning garden in a preschool, but along the way I have found the evidence of the Decline of Western Civilization. How can I teach children to be Kind when their own parents are not? I know poverty and despair, we had the commodities and the food stamps and WIC.  I am fortunate to have learned about loving and caring for others from my large extended family, albeit a co-dependent, conditional example. Being one of seven children, I suppose we HAD to be co-dependent.

Lillian Hellman said “you lose your manners when you’re poor.”

If I had been born a lady it wouldn’t have been very hard to act like one. -Annonymous

WP article about abortion clinic doctor…if you would deny a young girl her choice of abortion, whether a victim of rape or poor judgment, you must also provide an adoption alternative. Let’s just accept the fact that SEX HAPPENS.

Lawmakers, I agree with Chris Rock in that every momma needs to take care of her own babies. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXLby6zDVG8

When women continued to Work after WWII, one of the NOW platforms was better quality day care. Not everyone is a millionaire; we can’t all have nannies. Early childcare centers were parent co-ops, but as women continued to work outside the home there were fewer planned pregnancies. Young, unwed women, barely providing necessities for themselves at today’s minimum wage, cannot fathom the aspect of parenthood and yet it may find them. Who was it that said education & empowerment are the keys to advancing a society? Aristotle? Prof Tom Schmedeler? I can’t remember. I would happily stay home with my children, barefoot, in the kitchen, homemaker; but pay my husband a wage that will support all of us, from one job. He works two jobs, just to have enough money to be broke. Or end the profit motive and lower the cost of goods. Even staring up a home garden takes a little cash. Not as much as a business, but enough to trade any extra food at market. We’re a small family, with only two children.The way things are going, soon any aspect of the common welfare will be privatized, and the average wage earner will be doomed. The reason we need social services such as education and health care is because our income barely affords us a home mortgage, utilities, and consumables like food & clothing. And we have a decent income, well above the minimum wage in Kansas. Have you been wealthy too long to understand how the average working class citizen actually lives?

AHA! A Berkley study reports that yes, your greed inhibits your sympathy for others. So no, members of the D.C. Mafia cannot understand, to a turtle named Mack, five-hundred dollars is a lot of scratch. For an MRI. With Insurance. I think if you belong to an insurance group you should have zero co-pay and zero deductable.

So, Dear Reader, how do We the People reclaim our Government? Beyond the 99% Spring and the Buffet rule?

P.S. Please follow my links, and just keep swimming!

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